FHE: Positive Attitude

Discussion:
Our attitude affects how we see things.  If we turn clean-up time into a game and do it cheerfully, the time goes more quickly and we can even have fun.  If we start by complaining, though, adn focus on not being able to play, it takes longer and we end up feeling grouchy.

Having a positive attitude allows us to be happy even when things don't go the way we want them to.  Disappointments are a part of life.  We won't always get to do what we want, we won't always get to finish our game before coming in for dinner, we won't always get the answer that we were hoping for.  That's the reality--life is not always fair and life is not always fun, but through those realities, we have a chance to learn and become better.

When something doesn't go our way, we can stop and think, "is this a problem or a reality?"  If it is a problem, we can focus on how we can fix or change the situation.  If it's a reality (something we can't change), we can decide how we're going to deal with the situation.  We always have a choice of how we want to deal with things.

(Our 8 year old wrote up the following as he helped prepare this lesson.)

"Having a positive attitude is very important.  If we don't have a positive attidtude, how would we feel?  (mad, sad, frustrated)

How do we feel when we have a positive attitude?  (happy, have a fun time)

Our attitude affects people around us.  Having a positive attitude allows us to be happy even when we don't get what we want.  If we don't have a positive attitude, we are grouchy and it is not fun.  On the other hand, when we have a positive attitude, we are happy and we have fun."

Activity:
Show a magnifying glass and take turns looking at a few things through it to see how it works.  When we use it to focus on something, what happens?  It makes the object bigger.

The same is true for us.  When we choose to focus our time or thoughts on somethinbg, it becomes bigger and more important in our minds.

This can be a good thing when we focus on learning from the scriptures, studying for a test in school, etc., but it can be a bad thing when we focus on the problems and the negative things that we see.

For example, if you're playing a game outside and someone does something you don't like, you have a few choices.  You can:

• A.  Get upset and think about how unfair it is.  Pretty soon, you're frustrated that it's not going the way you want and it leads to yelling about how no one ever listens to you and how there's nothing fun to do and before long, you and everyone around you feels yucky and grouchy.
• B.  Ignore the problem and focus on having fun.  (If you focus on having fun, you probably will, even if others do things differently than you do.)
• C.  Try to solve the problem in a kind way (no yelling, hurting, threatening, or controlling) and talk about how you can make the game more fun for everyone or find something else to do.

The way you react to things that come up, can make a big difference in how you feel.  Whatever we choose to focus on is what we will notice most.  When faced with a difficult situation, we can choose to look for the good and make the best of things with a positive attitude.

Story:
Share this story from the November 2012 Friend about having a positive attitude in a challenging situation.  http://www.lds.org/friend/2012/11/a-positive-attitude?lang=eng

Testimony:
-importance of having a positive attitude
-with every situation we face, we have the opportunity to choose what we will focus on
-we invite the Spirit as we choose to look for the good instead of focusing on the negative

FHE: A Living Prophet

Discussion:
With General Conference approaching, we'll be talking about the significance of having a living Prophet and Apostles on the earth today and the blessings that come from following their counsel.

Activity:
Then we'll play a matching game to learn more about the members of the First Presidency and the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles.  (I pulled pictures and information from lds.org--look for the General Authorities section and you can read through their biographies.  Maybe one of these days, I'll figure out how to post the pdf here, but in the meantime, not that anyone actually reads this blog, but if you're interested in a copy of the game, leave a comment with your email and I'll send it to you.)

Testimony:
Bear testimony of the reality of a living prophet and the blessings that come from being able to receive direction from the Lord during General Conference.

FHE: Love at Home

Discussion:
Home should be a place where we feel safe and happy--a place where we know we are loved and accepted, a place where we can learn from one another and enjoy each other's company.  What are some words that describe how you would like our home to feel?  (make a list together)

Activity:
Take turns acting out scenarios and deciding how we could deal with these problems differently to create a loving atmosphere in our home.  (Make it a "movie night" and have one person be the director for each scenario.  After acting it out, the director gets to say "cut" and tell the "actors" how to change the scene to make it better.  Then change roles, so everyone gets a turn to be the director.)

#1:  Josh and Tyson came running through the front door, obviously upset.  Josh is yelling about Tyson kicking the soccer ball right at him and hitting him in the stomach.  Tyson is yelling about how he made a goal and Josh said it didn't count. 

#2:  Allison's Dad asked her to come brush her teeth, but she was too busy telling a joke to her brother to hear him.  When Allison's Dad finally got her attention, she got upset because she didn't like having him tell her what to do so she screamed and stomped down the hall. 

#3:  Sam loved to play baseball.  It was his favorite game.  As soon as he got his homework done, he went outside to practice hitting the ball.  When Mom called him to come in and clean up for dinner, he was still having a great time.  Sam was so upset about having to leave his favorite game, that he slammed the door and kicked the wall on his way in to make sure everyone knew he was upset.  When Mom asked him to pick up his things and come to dinner, he yelled, "No" and slumped down on the couch, refusing to do anything. 

#4:  Cami and Jessica are getting ready to play a game and Cami wants to go first.  She tells Jessica that she won't play anything with her unless she gets to go first.

#5:  Mom asked Aaron to straigten the family room before it was time for dinner.  As he was cleaning, he found a piece of paper that would be perfect for a paper airplane, so he stopped what he was doing to make one.  When Mom came back and asked him to finish quickly, Aaron got upset and told her if she didn't always bug him about cleaning up, it would get done faster. 

Dicsussion:
The way that we deal with situations affects the atmosphere of our home.  Each of us can make a difference in our home by taking a minute to think about how we want to react.  We can think about the example of the Savior and how we would want others to treat us. 

Testimony:
-We can make our home a place of happiness and love as we treat each other kindly. 
-Heavenly Father wants us to become like Him.  We can pray for His help to be more kind and loving, more patient and forgiving.

Father's Blessings

One of the things I loved growing up was receiving a Father's blessing at the beginning of every school year.  I remember how it felt to sit in the chair when it was my turn and feel my dad's hands on my head as he gave a blessing of counsel and encouragement specifically for me.  I looked forward to that special time each year and wanted to carry that tradition into our family.  So at the beginning of each school year, we have a Family Home Evening devoted to giving Father's blessings.  Hopefully it's something that our children will look forward to as well.

FHE: Trying to Be Like Jesus

Discussion:
(from May 1999 Friend http://lds.org/friend/1999/05/sharing-time-follow-jesus-christ?lang=eng)
We talk a lot about trying to be like Jesus and following His example, so how do we really do that?

When Jesus Christ lived on the earth, He set a perfect example for us to follow in treating other people. He said, “For I have given you an example, that ye should do as I have done to you” (John 13:15). He showed us at least three things that each of us can do: He was kind. He loved everyone. He served others.

I can be kind. Jesus taught that we can share what we have with others. We can visit people who are sick. We can make someone who is new feel welcome. Jesus did these things, and we can, too. He said that when we do these things for others, we are doing it for Him (see Matt. 25:40). When we share with others, we are not just sharing with them—we are sharing with Him. When we visit others, it is as if we are also visiting Him. When we make others feel welcome, we are making Him feel welcome, too. Surely that is why being kind helps us to have a good feeling and to feel close to our Savior.

I can love everyone. When Jesus knew that He was about to be crucified, He gave His disciples a most important commandment—to love one another the same way He loved them. He told them that people would know that they were His disciples if they followed this commandment. People will know that we are followers of Jesus Christ when they see that we are trying to love everyone.

I can serve others. Jesus spent His whole life serving others. He even gave His life for others—for us. He taught that the greatest among us would be those who serve others as He did (see Matt. 23:11). That is hard for some people to understand. They think that if everyone serves them, it means that they are very important. Jesus Christ taught a better way—to serve others by helping them, by comforting them, by treating them as He treated others.

Activity:

Read the scenarios and scripture references from the September 1990 Friend http://lds.org/friend/1990/09/sharing-time-try-to-be-like-jesus?lang=eng and decide how to follow the example of Jesus Christ.

Story:

Read about how being kind and unselfish makes us happy in "The Best Summer Day". http://lds.org/friend/2009/06/the-best-summer-day?lang=eng

Testimony:

-We can follow the example of Jesus Christ by being kind, by showing our love to others, and by serving.

-As we follow the example of Jesus Christ and try to make others feel good, we will be happy also.

FHE: Love

Activity:
Introduce the topic of Home Evening by giving these clues from pages 76 & 78 of the Family Home Evening Resource Guide.  Have everyone raise their hand when they think they know what we're talking about and let people guess after each clue.
1. We cannot see it.
2. We can feel it, but not with our hands.
3. It can be divided up indefinitely.
4. We will never run out of it.
5. It makes us happy.
6. It makes us want to do things for others.
7. It makes us humble.
8. It gives us patience.
9. It makes us want to avoid unrighteous actions.
10. It helps us to be contented with what we have.

Discussion:
Tonight we're talking about showing love in our home.  Why do you think it's important to show love?  (helps us to be happy and invite the Spirit into our home, etc.)  Who set an example for us of how to show love?  (Jesus Christ)  Think of a couple examples of times when Jesus showed love & discuss how we can follow His example.

Activity:
Play "spin the bottle" and have whoever it points to share a way that they can show love in our home.  (sharing, saying "I love you", giving hugs, letting someone else go first, listening and being obedient, being reverent, forgiving, etc.)  Then that person spins the bottle to see who will go next.

Testimony:
-We can follow the example of the Savior by showing love in our home.
-Showing love in our home helps us to invite the Spirit and be a happy family.

FHE: Testimony

Discussion:
What is a testimony?
A testimony is a spiritual witness of the truthfulness of the gospel and the reality of Heavenly Father & Jesus Christ given to us by the Holy Ghost.  Testimony means to know that something is real.

You can know that this table is real because you can touch it.  You can know that the sun is real because you can see it and feel it's warmth.  But how can you know that something is real when you can't see or touch it?  The Holy Ghost can help us to know that something is true by the way we feel.  When we do what is right or learn about something that is true, we feel good, warm or peaceful inside.  This is the witness of the Spirit that what we're doing or learning about is true.  Even though we haven't seen Jesus Christ, we can know that He is real and that He loves us.

A testimony doesn't come all at once.  President Uchtdorf talked about this in General Conference.  He said that instead of being one big event, gaining a witness or testimony, "often comes in the form of a puzzle--one piece at a time."  (May Ensign, p. 70)  As we learn about the gospel and try to do what is right, the Spirit will witness to us little by little that the things we are learning and doing are true.   

Activity:
How can you gain a testimony and help it grow? (pray, read the scriptures, attend Church, etc.)
Print out a picture from lds.org to cut it into a 9 piece puzzle.  (It could be a picture of the Savior, the First Vision, a child bearing testimony, etc.)
On the back of each piece, write one thing you can do to gain a testimony and help it grow: 
-Pray sincerely
-Read the Scriptures
-Attend Sacrament Meeting & Primary
-Follow the Prophet
-Obey the Commandments
-Try to be like Jesus
-Repent of any wrongdoing (so that you can have the Spirit with you)
-Participate in Family Home Evening
-Share your testimony with others
Then discuss each action as you put the puzzle together.  (You could hide the pieces around the room and reiterate how we gain our testimonies one piece at a time.)

Unlike this puzzle, though, our testimonies are never finished.  We need to strengthen our testimonies throughout our entire lives by continuing to learn and do what is right.

Discussion:
How can you share your testimony?
-There are many ways we can share our testimonies.  A testimony doesn't have to be formal or use certain words.  We can bear our testimony with simple statements.  We may talk about things that we know or believe with our family members or friends.  We can also bear our testimony through our actions--by living in accordance with what we believe or know is true.

-When we bear our testimonies in Sacrament meeting, we should keep them simple and focused on the Savior and the things that we know are true.  Sometimes it is appropriate to share an experience that helped to strengthen our testimony, but we shouldn't tell stories to entertain or draw attention to ourselves.  Testimonies are heartfelt expressions of the things we know to be true.  As we bear pure testimony, we will invite the confirming witness of the Holy Ghost.  Our own testimonies will be strengthened as we bear them.

Activity:
Use this activity from the October 2008 Friend to review the essential parts of a testimony.  You can attach the pictures to a glove, or make them into finger puppets.  Or simply trace a hand and glue the pictures onto the fingers as you discuss what each one represents and how you could share that part of your testimony. 
http://lds.org/friend/2008/10/testimony-glove?lang=eng&query

Each person can try on the glove and tell about the five parts of a testimony or bear their testimony of these things if they'd like to.  (Don't pressure anyone to bear their testimony as they should be heartfelt and personal.)

Testimony:
-Each one of us can gain our own testimonies of the gospel.  As we learn about Heavenly Father & Jesus Christ and try to do what is right, the Holy Ghost will witness to us that the things we are learning and doing are true.
-We can strengthen our testimonies each day as we try to live the gospel.  Little by little, our testimonies will continue to grow stronger throughout our lives.